simulation

do i exist
am i just floating

i was an island
and you were a city
of broken skyscrapers

we’ll pretend i belong
with the trees
don’t hide me away

i’ll play along
i’ll pretend
i’m doing okay

desire

can i be honest
odd numbers make me
uncomfortable
no TV volume should ever
see a 1, 3, 5, 7 or 9

let me be honest
even numbers make me
more comfortable
give me something i can appreciate
like a 2, 4, 6, 8

is there anything left to desire

the problem of death

the problem of death
is that it lingers
before its final
reveal, once it has arrived
it meets you in the dark
looks you in the eyes

and stabs you in the heart

the problem with death
is that it hurts
more than anything ever will

it creeps up on you

pain
questioning the inevitable
when will i experience this again

moth

don’t show me in the light
turn it off
don’t highlight me
in your soft beams
don’t illuminate my features
you can keep them in your dreams

i won’t move to the light
i’m not a moth
please stop

a reminder

when the rain
is coming
or clouds darkening

when the mind
is stretching
or deeply overthinking

when your hand
is shaking
or subtly trembling

when the sky
isn’t blue
or brightly shading

when my mouth
is silent
or quietly speaking

what the mirror
isn’t showing
or secretly hiding

take this as a reminder
you must be kinder

suspended in air

where have they gone
someone said they’re all around
us, but how come all i see
is sadness

what are they doing
someone said they’re watching over
us, but all i can see
is unhelpful clouds
and a sun that dares to shine without them

how are they now
someone said they’re doing much better
but how can they be without
us

somewhere between this land
and the next, they are angels
dancing suspended in air

truth

one day it’s gonna hurt
when your eyes
won’t open
when your voice will speak
no more
your feet won’t move
like they did before

but

i’ll still smile
when my eyes
won’t stop leaking
when my voice is quiet
yet again
when my feet move slower
than they did before

the truth my dear
we don’t keep our youth
it will disappear
don’t worry

so embarrassing

i feel the letters on my tongue
they’ve crept up my throat
but they can’t escape
no wonder the words found their home
on the page

i know what to say
but cheeks flash pink
hands twist shake
please don’t look at me
i’ve forgotten what i’m supposed to say

beach

salty sea
twists its waves
around shapely sandcastles
raspberry ripples
swirled into velvety vanilla
curved coastlines
welcome us
shining sunlight beams
eyes half closed
that’s a day at the beach i suppose

a recurring dream

i can’t count how many times
i’ve slipped into sleep
and dreamt of you
wondering if you’re far away
or standing beside me
a recurring dream

they call it, or is it a daydream
that calls to me, is it you time
after time that comes to visit me
when i’m twirling into sleep
and moving away
from reality, is it you

can it be you
that sweeps into my dreams
can it be you, did you never go away
can it be you this time
i say, i wish you didn’t only visit in sleep
can it be you that sits beside me

can’t you come and wave goodbye to me
can’t you show me that you’re
there, can’t you show me i’m not really sleeping
can’t you show me that we’re wide awake and dreaming
can’t you pause time?
no, don’t go away

you said you wouldn’t go away
but i’ve been delayed, go without me
don’t forget our time
together, i won’t forget you
you’re only a dream
away, but i’m scared to sleep

to creep up the stairs, sleep
awaits me ready to take me away
for a few hours to propel me into a dream
a quiet darkened area to me
it seems, i wait for you
for the last time

but you have dreamt one too many a permanent sleep evaporates your time away
but what is me without you
when i couldn’t help you stay